This question strikes terror into the hearts of men across the world.
But….I was recently outside smoking with a group of women and somehow we all got into quite a revealing conversation about boxers or briefs.
They looked at me and asked. I retorted with ‘why in the hell is that important?’.
‘Just answer the question’ is why it’s important by the way. This is also one incentive, in a growing list, to give up smoking.
I answered (wouldn’t you like to know? ok, probably not…).
So why is it important to know? I personally believe that there is an inherent need in some women to know exactly what goes on around them at all times. That’s not a bad thing, per say. It’s just a thing.
I find that the question makes me think too much. I already think about my crotch way too much. Now I have to think about how to dress it up too? As long as ‘little’ red bows aren’t one of the options, I’ll be fine. That’s too much work and if I tell you why it would be too much information.
I don’t know why there are only 2 options presented in this question. There are many possibilities. For instance, the ‘neither’ option exists. Although there are a couple of different options for this too; sub-options as it were. The occasionally tempting ‘Commando’, which means wearing no underwear at all. I will admit right this very moment that this is only a last resort for me. Seams kill my sensitive skin. This may be appealing for some, jiggling around all day free to roam about the fabric, but for me it just sucks.
Another option would delve into a wide range of possibilities. You know, boxer briefs are nice. But let’s not be narrow minded and eliminate wearing the Speedo like underwear…man thongs, as it were. Of course I don’t understand thongs in the first place, but that’s another blog. Some wear lacy underwear. Hey, I say don’t throw stones, right? Others need to wear those pull up things for incontinence or anal leakage or whatever. That must be mortifying to be asked boxers or briefs. Here’s the answer: ”I feel as though that question objectifies me in every way and doesn’t take into consideration or appreciation the person that I am. But if you must know, I wear briefs.” So there.
Yes, I often wonder why it’s important to know. There’s that whole fertility thing where, if a guy is wearing boxers, it’s supposed to help increase the sperm count. I don’t know about that. I don’t analyze sperm. So wearing the boxers has an advantage with women who are looking for not only a husband, but also a family.
Briefs are nice and tidy. Well, usually briefs are nice and tidy. I have been know to wear underwear that’s stretched out with holes and stains which were able to be identified in the year 1987. I have been getting better at keeping my underwear more modern. I even have a new pack that are still brand new and unopened.
Still, a nice pair of tidy whities is very visually appealing and also comforting to wear. At the very least you feel comfortable knowing that if you do get into that accident you will make your mother very proud. I am of the personal opinion that the Commando method would be the best option in an accident, though. It eliminates at least one step in the caring.
Well, I am no closer to understanding why the question is important. I’d never ask, strapless or sports bra? And not because it’s inappropriate of would be the catalyst for many slaps across my face. Nope. The real reason is that I don’t care. And I never think about it. I see no reason to. I have way too much clutter in my head as it is. The knowledge does not identify one marker that would be even remotely important to me.
The only thing that I can even think of as to why it would be important is that people are attracted to different things. THAT I understand. I love seeing a woman fresh out of the shower with her hair wet and in a white button down shirt. So maybe that’s it. Maybe it’s just an image of a face that they like attached at the bottom to whatever they find attractive. Hmm. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. I sort of like the idea of being objectified.
Now that I think about it, it has been a while since I’ve been to the gym but I’d be willing to guess that my trainer is wearing the sports bra.
